Tuesday, February 28, 2006

trimming the tree

There's an amazing impermanence to everything if you watch long enough. I suppose that's what we all find so magical about photographs and paintings - the ability to pause time and make something permanent.

A few months ago, I blogged about how I had been driving to work and had been moved by the way a particular tree looked with the foggy SF Bay in the background. It was so breath-taking to me that I parked my car, got out, and snapped a picture of the whole scene. Well, Amanda saw the picture I had taken and was also so moved by it that she decided to paint a picture of it. It turned out beautifully and the picture now hangs in our office in our apartment.

Since she painted the tree, I've come to think of it as "Amanda's tree." I look at it every day on my drive into work and smile as I think of her. It's a nice little moment I get to have each day during what is a relatively long commute to work.

Well, last night the Bay area was slammed with a vicious storm. According to the news, San Francisco was hit the worst with ridiculous gale force winds that tore apart powerlines and littered our entire neighborhood with other shattered shards of people's recycling. Unfortunately, I was also really bummed to see that Amanda's tree took a bit of damage from the storm as well.

If you look at the picture of the tree, you'll see that it has some cool lower branches just hanging out below the general mop of its main bunch of foliage (is it right to call that little tuft at its top its 'canopy?'). This morning, it was sad to see that those lower branches were all snapped and dangling limply from the trunk amidst a mess of splintered wood.

It was a bummer to see. But, just as quickly as it was sad to see, it also made me feel really glad that I had decided to take that picture back in September. Now I feel like Amanda and I have taken some sort of special steps to save the memory of a tree that might be blow away into the Bay one day. If it does, we'll still have it around to enjoy through the permanence Manda's art.

It's a nice thought.

Monday, February 27, 2006

quawesome.

Sometimes it seems to me that humanity can be defined as "the daily battle to not look like an idiot in front of other human beings, despite your brain's hardwired propensity for doing just that."

Here at work, we just had a beautiful new Foley pit installed in our beautiful new Recording Studio. It's very nice and will be a tremendous boon to us for audio work going forward.

I mentioned this to a colleague today and started to tell him all about it. Apparently, his brain couldn't make up its mind between commenting with "Cool" or "Sweet."

What I got in response was "Quweet."

At that moment, I held a lot of power over this guy. It was obvious that he knew he'd just said "Quweet." And yet, while he wondered if I had caught it, I had the power to either ignore it, smile, or outright mock the birth of "Quweet" into the English language.

I decided to ignore it. But, man oh man. How we ever manage to get anything done when our freakin' brains work against us so much of the time, I'll never know ...

purdy with a capital "P"

Cirque du Soleil's "Corteo" is staggeringly beautiful. I can't possibly recommend it enough. If you've never been to a Cirque show, it's typically a circus show centered around three main tenets: Amazing Acrobatics dressed in an Imaginative Presentation and set to Live Music. Typically, they tend to rank in importance in that order as well.

However, Corteo was breath-taking. With Corteo, the Imaginative Presentation jumped way into the lead among the three priorities and it left Amanda and I astounded. As a concept, the entire show is done as though you're watching an old Italian clown dream about his own death and how all of his circus friends would celebrate his life. It's a good concept to start with, but the execution couldn't have been better.

What truly amazed me about the experience is just how much the entire experience really does feel like a dream. At times everything makes sense - the Clown dreams of his friends holding a parade in his honor that gets out of control and becomes far too happy for a funeral procession, Angels cart him into the sky and fit him with wings, snippets of memories literally drift in and out of the audiences field of vision. But, at other times, nothing makes sense and the entire three-dimensional canvas of the stage resembles a surrealist painting more than any kind of circus I've ever seen. It was this frequent use of unrelated, almost non sequitur-esque dream imagery that left me feeling so ... childlike.

Bizarre imagery is everywhere. Angels drift through the air constantly - observing, caring for people, taking part peripherally in the events, the head of a horse costume running around onstage without the body, trails of shoes that run across the stage without anyone wearing them as they're protected from nothing by a man carrying an umbrella. At one point during one of the acrobatic routines, I realized that there was a clown walking upside down along the length of a tightrope with a flaming candelabra in his hand.

It was like watching Jim Henson or Stephen Spielberg at their best. I absolutely adore any piece of art that can make me feel completely astounded by the power of Human Imagination and its ability to make dreams reality through technology and talent. It was incredibly inspiring. Watching a 2-hour testament to the beauty of human creativity is the closest I get to having a religious experience.

So, anyway, the moral of this long-winded ramble is "Go see 'Corteo.'" You won't be disappointed.

Friday, February 24, 2006

the 2 minute blog post

I only have two minutes to write a blog post before I have to leave. Amdna and I are going out tonight to see Corteo down in San Jose. it's the new sircyq du soliel pthing they have going on.

This bpost is a mess because I todon't have time for the delete kiey. So this is what it looks like when I make all kinds of mistakes.

Anyeaway,m time for me to tecake off. tomorrow it's car wash and laundry day. tonight, culture.

have a great weekend everyone. you you all get to do something fun.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

my brain feels like noodles

I feel like a bit of a spaz right now. Today has been so hectic. I've been running around juggling three different projects all day long. I feel like my phone and email have been nagging at me non-stop all day. Now that it's the end of the day, my brain just feels tired.

I got to show someone at work Vaz Hoil for the first time today. They loved it. It's always fun to share that particular brand of retahdedness with someone new. Tommy Rockum should be proud that his lyrics to Rock Rock Rock (Rock Rock!) got constant laughs throughout.

blah. I'm so ready to go home. I just have to tackle some more crap before I can. A nice night at home and then it all starts again tomorrow.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

a war by any other name

NPR was mentioning this morning the Bush Administration's new approach to rename "The War on Terror" to something more stirring, something that harkens back to the good ol' days of The Cold War. Rumsfeld seems to have settled on the Orwellian term "The Long War" which I find to be creepy as fuck.

I've always said that there's no way you can wage war on a noun like Terrorism or Drugs. Wars are fought against people, nations, and organizations. So, at least they seem to recognize that it's not going to cut it to keep calling it something useless.

But, The Long War? Jebus cripes, that's scary. Adios, any hope for a quick resolution. And with that you are effectively plunging a generation of people into hopelessness. It's like the Administration has always done all along: keep the public in a state of fear, remove their rights, and then tell them that it's for their own good.

The thing is, I was thinking about this this morning. The only thing that let's them get away with renaming the "war" (wasn't Congress supposed to vote us into a War, King George?) is that it's coming from a unified small group of people who can all repeat the same message. There is absolutely nothing stopping the general public from getting behind the cause of renaming the conflict to something else. All it takes is a unified effort. If everyone were to start referring to it as something else, then the public holds the same power to change the name of this debacle as it's architects do.

So, anyway, feel free to leave a suggestion in the comments. I suggest The Wrong War.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

oh yeah ... and this

Somehow amidst all of the anti-flea mania I was going through last night, I forgot to mention my big news of the weekend. Republic Commando was nominated for a 2005 Game Audio Network Guild award for Best Interactive Score of the year.

I'm really happy and honored to be nominated for this award. The interactive nature of Republic Commando's score was a tremendous priority for me when I was working on the project and something that I take a lot of pride in. So, it really means a lot to me to see it recognized by industry peers.

RC is also up for Sound Design of the Year, which rocks. So, yay David Collins as well. My only problem now will be trying to wait calmly until the award ceremony towards the end of March.

Monday, February 20, 2006

just like our founding fathers did

Manda and I spent our President's Day weekend bombing for fleas and watching gay cowboys. As best as we can figure, the recent bout of warm weather we had last month created an explosion of fleas that bombarded our cat, invaded our living room, laid seige to our office, and pretty much just held one massive flea-kegger all over our apartment for a while.

Well, no more, you little blood sucking bastards ...

We've reclaimed the apartment, reclaimed the cat, and reclaimed some semblance of normalcy around here. So, that's awesome. And it only slightly bothers me that I can smell deadly chemicals in the air three hours after the "half hour post-bomb ventilation period" was over.

We also saw "Brokeback Moutain" with some friends Sunday night. It was a pretty good flick. But ... holy hell ... is that movie S..... L......... O.......................... W........................................................ I didn't know much about the movie before I went in (but apparently more than some people did, though; I'll get to that in a sec) but I guess I assumed it was about some kind of summer fling these cowboys had. Nope. The film spans about 20 years and at times seemed like it was going to all happen in real time. Still, a good movie.

Okay, that story I promised. Apparently, the message of the movie, the marketing of the movie, the social dialogue that the entire country is having about this movie hasn't exactly reached everyone yet. When we went to the flick, there were three people in front of us who had all happily plunked down ten bucks to buy a ticket, said the words "three for 'Brokeback Mountain' please" and then marched themselves into the theatre to find seats. However, as soon as the relationship between the two cowboys started to get a little frisky, there was a flurry of conversation between the three of the people in front of us and they abruptly left the theatre - never to return. Who goes to see "Brokeback Mountain" without any knowledge that it's a movie about a gay love affair?

I didn't see it, but apparently the guy in the group must have felt suddenly very threatened by the film. Right before they left, he was seen making it a point to make out very forcibly with his wife/girlfriend/mistress/whateva. Can you say "overcompensating?" We can. And we did.

Anyway, that was our weekend. We're now marching around the apartment like it's V-F day. I'm gonna' go enjoy my new flea-free life here and maybe celebrate with a little ice cream and a cream soda. I hear that's how the French celebrated after WWII.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

i finally found my blues name

Alright, well maybe I shouldn't say "finally." It's not like I've really been searching for one. But, I just got a great piece of spam. Among as string of things about enlarging parts of my body herbally, it also contained what is totally gonna be the name of my first blues album, should I ever choose to record one. Plus, as an added bonus, it gave me my blues artist name, too. So, all in all, a pretty useful piece of uselessness.

So, the album will be:

"Prison Music Pride" by Lashawana Dan.

I love it.

Friday, February 17, 2006

won't you come home, bill bailey?

Okay. It's official. It's time to mourn the loss of Guns & Roses. Why now? Why a good 15 years or so since the release of Use Your Illusions 1 and 2? Because it looks like 2006 is actually going to be the release year for the nearly mythical Chinese Democracy album.

For those who don't know, Chinese Democracy is the Guns & Roses album that Axel Rose has been working on for over a decade. He has spent millions of dollars remixing, retracking, reinventing, etc. Axel and Guns had so much potential to really just own all of rock and roll and become one of the greatest bands of all time. But Axel's ego and his own sense of perfectionistic diva-esque mania led to Guns' destruction, his own Brian Wilsonish reclusive hermit status, and flushed all of their promise down the 90s drain.

Well, after an eternity without a new Guns tune, someone finally leaked the first track off of Chinese Democracy. I heard it on our local classic rock station tonight as I was driving home. And you know what? Guns & Rose are dead. In fact, I don't even think they should use the name anymore because this new stuff so seriously tarnishes the awesomeness that is Appetite for Destruction. If they'd like, they can rename themselves Axel Rose Has His Head So Far Up His Ass He Can Smell His Own Lungs. Go ahead, guys; you can have that name. It's my "welcome back" gift to you.

The new song is called "IRS" and, if you want to hear it, I'd imagine it's getting tossed around pretty freely on the peer-to-peer networks right now. Suffice it to say, it's the equivalent of digital ass. Never before have I heard a rock tune that seemed to lack more focus. To all the record producers out there who are having a hard time justifying their jobs, congrats. You just found for yourselves the new "And here's what can happen without a Producer" audio example. It's more like some sort of John Lennon multi-tracking/layering experiment than a focused rock tune. Multiple guitars are soloing around wildly while Axel wails about the IRS and the FBI. He still sounds like he's got the vocal chops, but ... the song writing, guys. The song writing ... what happened? It's just all over the place, like watching someone's house being blown around by a tornado. Sure, you can sorta' see that it was probably a house at one point or another. But in it's current state, things are flying off of it in pieces and it looks more like a mess in motion than anything welcoming and you know it's just going to land in a heap of crap when everything's over.

I just found myself wincing throughout the whole tune instead of really enjoying it like I was hoping I would. So, Guns & Roses is dead. Long live Velvet Revolver. And I can official scratch Chinese Democracy off of my "hope that gets released one day" list.

Such a disappointment ...

age is just a number, baby

When I sewed a Double Dragon patch onto the front of my jacket a few years ago, I figured I'd get a few comments from people who played the game in the 80s and remember it fondly. What I didn't expect were the questions I get from elderly Asian women.

Oddly, this happens more frequently than you'd think it would. There's something about the Double Dragon logo that apparently makes it look like the logo for a Chinese restaurant. I'm frequently stopped by elderly Asian women who always have the same conversation with me.

Old Lady: What is that? "Double Dragon." What is that?
Me: Oh ... it's just an old video game from the 80s.
Old Lady: Oh, okay. I thought it was a restaurant.

See? Proof positive. Anyway, I had the same conversation again this morning when I stopped for gas on my way to work. What I didn't expect, however, was the reaction I got when I told the 60-something woman working at the gas station that it was a video game and not a restaurant.

"Oh! Are you in the games industry? I love video games!" She then proceeded to tell me a story about how she made her grand-daughter cry because she hogged the game console. Her daughter apparently had to comfort the grand-daughter with the very soothing words, "It's okay, honey. Grandma is just like that sometimes."

This nice old lady then proceeded to talk to me about games and about my job at LucasArts. She was so excited to talk games. She also wanted me to know that if we're looking for testers that I "shouldn't let the gray hair fool [me]," she'd love to work as a tester and play games all day long.

So, the lesson for today is: don't let the gray hair fool you. Somewhere in the world right now there's probably a senior citizen making all of the neighborhood children cry with their mad Tekken skillz.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Pet Peeve No. 1

I don't know why, but I feel the need this morning to enumerate my pet peeves. Rather than flumping down a big list of them here, I thought I'd just dole them out one by one as I think of them over time.

First up: Using Movie Quotes in DVD Commercials to Comment on the DVD's Release

I hate this crap. It always annoys the hell out of me. There are - as far as I can tell - two trains of thought when it comes to doing a commercial for a DVD. You have to show footage of the movie and you therefore will most likely be playing a least some dialogue. Now, you can apparently either 1.) play random pieces of dialogue that seem to encapsulate the movie's tone ("I see dead people ..."), or 2.) you can pull random lines of dialogue from the film and intercut it with the narrator to make it sound as if the movie and your narrator are having a conversation.

Approach 1 doesn't bother me at all. But, holy crap in a hat, Approach 2 annoys the bejesus out of me every single time I see it. Mainly it's because the lines of dialogue that are selected are either ridiculously obtuse in how they're "commenting" on the narration or they're so representative of a scene that I recognize that I don't realize it was a comment on the narration and I sit there thinking "Why did they play that clip?" I then sit there thinking about it, have stopped watching the commercial, miss whatever it is they're saying, and then realize what was going on originally. And I get annoyed.

I mean, it's always something like this:

Narrator: This summer ...
[shot of random Disney characters running]

Narrator: a beloved classic comes to your home for the first time in history.
[cut to a shot of non-main character/obscure character]

Obscure Character: I find that hard to believe!

Narrator: On July 24th, Dumbiochio comes home on DVD.
[cut to random action sequence with happy cartoon animals in a bobsled]

Cartoon animals in unison: AWESOME!!

Narrator: Loaded with extra features, posthumous director's commentary by Walt Disney, and an interactive Storyboard featurette, Dumbiochio is sure to endure for generations to come.
[cut to shot of main character looking angrily at another character]

Main Character: I knew you were going to say that!

Narrator: But it's only available for a limited time, so don't miss this golden opportunity to own your very own copy of Dumbiochio on July 24th!
[cut to shot of crowd of happy animals]

Crowd of animals: [cheering wordlessly with whooping and "yays"]

[END]

That is the crap I'm talking about. I can't stands it, I tells ya. I wish they would stop and just show the damn movie instead of feeling like the public demands some kind of creative editing to make the movie comment on its own release.

If you're listening, Disney (which I know you're not), knock it off. It's dumb.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

meet the press

As of today, I'm officially a published author. I'm pretty psyched about it. Today at work I got a package in the mail from the Game Developer folks with three copies of the issue containing my Audio article. Well, actually, I suppose it isn't "as of today, I'm published." It was mailed yesterday and was probably printed sooner, so I guess it should be "as of last week, I'm a published author."

Sheesh. Wouldn't want to piss off the Blog Police, again ...

Anyway, I'm happy to see this thing here in my hands and I feel really good about it. It's nice to feel like I'm contributing back to the industry in at least some small way with the things I've learned by working on stuff over the last few years.

Plus, it's cool to now have an "Articles" section on my resume.

I had something else I wanted to say, but I forget what it was. So ... let's just go with "Be excellent to each other."

Monday, February 13, 2006

zero to sixty and old skool science

I just got super busy out of nowhere. After not having much of anything to do for the past few months, I'm now staring down the barrel of 3 simultaneous projects. And after not writing a note of music in a year and eight months, I now have to fire up Logic and start cranking on some new material.

When it rains it pours, I s'pose. Or like the North East just learned, when it snows, it fuckin' dumps it.

This weekend, Amanda and I inherited from her mom a wonderful old book called the New Century Book of Facts. This particular edition was published in 1943 and is a really interesting snapshot into the science, history, and politics of the time. Along with entries which outline the mysterious and "unknown country" of the human spleen, creepy mentions of Eugenics that show a total lack of understanding of how at that very time Eugenics were destroying Europe's Jewish population, and descriptions of how to send a still image via radio waves, there were also mentions of a planetoid called Eros.

Now, this was weird to me because I didn't have any idea what it was talking about when it said there is a large planetoid parked between Earth and Mars named Eros. I thought "well .. wait... how come I've never heard of this thing before?" Well, it turns out that I have and just didn't recognize it when described as a planetoid. Eros is 433 Eros, the asteroid that just recently had some crap of NASA's parked on it. So, today's Science Lesson of the Day is: When you time travel back to 1943, the word for asteroid is "planetoid."

Also interesting to note was that they thought Pluto was larger than Earth, Venus, Mars, and Mercury and that the idea of plate tectonics was just about as fringe a notion as earthquakes being caused "by the Moon's tides effecting the mostly liquid core of the Earth."

That's the funny thing about a book called the New Century Book of Facts. You'd better really know they're facts or else some dork will poke fun at you and your crazy out-dated ideas 80 67 years into the future.

And that's a fact.

UPDATE: In order to comply with my citations from the Math and Blog Police, I've replaced the number 80 as it was originally in my blog. I then proceeded to strike it out and replace it with a fancy 67 (which is large Times Roman fonted and set to the color 3366ff). I then went ahead and added a block of update text at the end describing all of the dumbass changes I've had to make.

Friday, February 10, 2006

back from the beyond

I'm back at work today for the first time in two days. I was out sick again. I thought about blogging while I was home, but then didn't. Go figure.

So, what was my second sick-out like? I got pretty stir crazy. I was thinking about wandering around my apartment in my pajamas and making a photo documentary of my time home sick. The thing is, before I started to snaps shots of Mount Jenga and some empty pudding cups, I came to my senses and realized that no one on Earth would actually care about any of that. So, good thing then.

I'm glad to be out in the world again. It felt very strange to step outside, just as it always does after a prolonged stretch of time cooped up inside. Amanda had surgery this morning to get her wisdom teeth removed. I'm dying to know how she's doing. I'll be spending my weekend as the Health Brigade making sure that she's comfortable and resting up.

The Last Samurai is a so-so movie. Elektra is a lousy movie. Resident Evil 4 keeps getting better (though the voice acting is still total ass) and Burnout Revenge totally r0><0rz. I guess that's it for me. Nothing all that exciting ever happens when you're home sick.

Unless you're Ferris Bueller. And I'm most definitely not Ferris Bueller.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

grumpy ain't just a dwarf in the woods

I'm in a pissy mood today. I could tell I was going to be in a crappy mood when I had some serious road rage issues directed towards the world's slowest motorcycle on the way to work today. I mean, seriously though, have you ever - EVER - seen a motorcycle that goes the speed limit? I didn't think it was mechanically possible for a motorcycle to even go 25 mph. And yet, I find the one that can when I'm running late for a department meeting this morning.

Anyway, it's just kinda' all been a slide from there today. Everyone around here is telling me to go to the doctor to have my cold taken a look at. I'm starting to feel like Jim Henson. I keep saying "Phht. Forget it. It's just a cold and I'll be fine." For all I know, I've got Indonesian Bird Ebola and I'll be dead by this time next week.

Last night I had a nightmare that I was surrounded in the woods by a pack of rabid raccoons who were carnivorously tearing apart a family of dear. All the while, they just kept staring at me like I was next. It was unsettling, to say the least.

All of my afternoon meetings were cancelled and rescheduled, which is maybe a good thing since I'm so rosy and social today. I wish the Presidio had a batting cage.

Monday, February 06, 2006

rooni, i'm comin' home

I'm feeling particularly moody this evening. Not sure why. Well, that's not entirely true. I know a few really good reasons why. Unfortunately, I can't really talk about them. Suffice it to say, everything in my personal life is fine. It's not located there. But, I'm feeling moody about other aspects of my life.

Doesn't help that I've been listening to Ray Lamontagne at work today. There's something about his album that's like sitting in front of a warm fire. It makes you feel fuzzy, deadens you to the world a bit and seeps into your bones.

All day long, all I've wanted to do is blow off work, drive down to Amanda's office, pick her up and going out for a picnic somewhere. Someplace quiet and calm where we can just sit together, enjoy each other's company, and I can feel peaceful.

Maybe part of this funk I'm in is from a week of crappy night's sleep. My cold seems to hit me hardest now in the middle of the night. I wake up repeatedly every night with coughing fits. Niquil doesn't help.

Somehow it's past 6:30 already. Last time I checked, it was about 3. I dunno where the day went. Guess I'll get out of here and head home, spend my evening with Manda like I've wanted to do all day. See if her smile can't shake off this funk I'm in.

It's been known to happen.

Friday, February 03, 2006

hi ho hi ho

I went back to work today after my snot-filled, mid-week vacation. Today has repeatedly felt like Monday; despite it's most certainly not being Monday.

I got the article done. Now it's waiting in an in-box awaiting PR approval. But, at least it's out of my hands.

Manda and I are having some friends over this weekend to watch the Super Bowl. We did this last year and had a really nice time. I couldn't tell you who even played in the Super Bowl last year, but I can tell you that the blueberry yogurt fruit dip Amanda made was a hit. I was asked today by a friend who's coming on Sunday "Will Amanda's World-Famous Fruit Dip be there?"

I'm really tired of coughing today. Thankfully I'm in a sound-proof office, so the rest of the company isn't sick of hearing me cough. I'm also sick of being clammy and cold from having a fever break at random intervals.

Maybe it's time to go home early.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

back in block

I have writers' block. I've been asked to write another article for Game Developer magazine, this time on Smart Combat Music Interactivity. I'm blogging as a means of stalling because I'm tired of writing sentences and then erasing them.

I hate writers' block. It makes me feel stupid, as though I don't have the ability to make a cohesive point.

I'm starting to feel guilty about blogging instead of writing, so I guess I'll go try and plug away at it.

800 words isn't a lot. I don't know why I'm having so much trouble.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

butterfly in the sky?

Last night sucked. Sickness took complete control of me and at about 2 AM I woke up shivering like crazy. For over an hour I lay there like that until my erratic breathing woke up Amanda who then proceeded to take care of me until I fell back to sleep.

I don't know what the hell was wrong with me. I didn't have a fever; and yet I couldn't stop shivering. Beyond that were the very odd thoughts kicking around in my head. First a little background ...

[wigglyDreamSequence]
Last Sunday, our typically very quiet street was strangely noisy early in the morning. People were laughing, talking, and somewhere nearby someone was practicing the saxophone. This was new. I've never heard a peep from our street before and it all took me by surprise.
[/wigglyDreamSequence]

Now, back to last night. For whatever the hell reason, I was CONVINCED as I lay there shivering last night that the previous Sunday morning had been like an episode of Reading Rainbow. I know I wasn't asleep; I was shivering like mad and fully awake. And yet, there I was completely fixated on a TV show I haven't seen in about 20 years.

I kept picturing book illustrations with a narrator's voice (much like Alfre Woodard's, believe it or not) and small ensemble jazz underscore playing along with it.

"Myyyyy Streeeet." said Alfre, drawing the vowels out in a soothing childlike way. "By Marcus Dellwater. Illustrated by Johanna Lundbourne. As read by Alfre Woodard."

"My street is aliiiiiive. Morning, Noon, and Night my street is alive with the sounds of the City."

Et cetera. The entire childrens' book wrote itself over and over again in my head while I tried desperately to stop shivering. I have no idea what the hell was wrong with me, but I lived some weird hour-long Reading Rainbow waking nightmare last night and find myself thoroughly baffled by it this today.

Being sick sucks. Your brain does weird things. Your body feels terrible. I can't wait to get better. Being sick totally sucks.

But, you don't have to take my word for it.