Monday, July 25, 2005

beachy keen

This weekend my kid sister flew out to visit me.

Amanda, kid sister, and I all had a fun time yesterday. Went to the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk and rode the roller coasters until I was turning green and couldn't do it anymore. Yep. I dunno what happened. I used to be able to ride on anything; fear was the only thing that stopped me in the past. You know, fear of those coasters that do a billion loops and then spin you around the world so fast that you actually turn back time like Supes with a bug up his butt only to then do it all in reverse and put the world back to rights? Anyway, somehow I went from having some kind of +3 fortitude saving throw for my Constitution to having some kind of Curse of Jello Stomach. Oh, and apparently now tons of nerdy references waiting in the wings like "+3 fortitude saving throw." Awesome.

Anyhow, "we went to Santa Cruz" is what I was trying to say. We had fun. It's nice to see her. Although, I get the feeling that she doesn't know quite how to act around me. There's a big 13 year age difference between us and I moved away from home when she was only 6. Now she's almost 16. I think she thinks I want her to act younger than she is. I don't know; it's hard to describe. But I get a sense sometimes like she probably tries to act older than she is when she's around her friends or around my parents; but tries to act a bit younger and more goofy around me. Maybe it's a good thing. Maybe not. I don't know.

She's growing up and I can understand that. It's so obvious every time I see her again that I'm seeing her life in snapshots. Every six months or so, I get to see her again for a week or so. It's like flashcards of her childhood or some other suitable metaphor. Meanwhile, I'm just me and I think she might feel like she has to act a certain way around me to feel accepted by me.

I hope that's not the case. And I've never really talked about it with her. I just wonder.

Anyway, that was the weekend, I guess. : /

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