Every morning that I take the train to work, I spend a little time reading the newspapers in the newspaper boxes while I wait for the Ghost Train to arrive. Most days, I'll just glance at the headlines. Sometimes I actually sit there and read some of the articles.
Today, however, most of the papers were gone. That, however, didn't stop me from getting today's headlines.
This real-world blog post was taped to the inside of the newspaper box. I'd imagine that the real paper probably would have just said much of the same thing, only taken a much longer time to get to the point.